When a couple splits, it's a wonderful thing when they can
continue to work together as parents. Coming together to make decisions
about the children allows the child to see that even though their
parents aren't a couple, they both want what's best for them. But, what
happens when parents begin to date other people? What happens when a
parent's new partner wants to play a major role in making decisions
about the children?
Dating and co-parenting isn't always easy. No one ever wants to make the person that they're with believe that their feelings and opinions aren't valued. It's natural for the person that loves you to want to play a role in every facet of your life. Still, there are many things that parents need to think about when they are in a co-parenting situation.
Primarily, the depth of your new relationship needs to be evaluated before you even think about having this person involved in your child's life. It's pointless to introduce your child to an individual who isn't going to be around long. Children become attached to new parent figures quite easily. There is no need to put them in a predicament where they can be mislead.
Next, if you intend to make the new love of your life a permanent fixture, it would only make sense that the other parent is aware of it. This is not to say that your ex has any power in your personal life. However, there is a new person who will be a permanent presence in your child's life. This is especially true when there are younger children in the home. It's about having a mutual respect for one another.
Co-parenting only works on the basis that both parents are involved, to some level, in the choices that are made for the children; regardless of which parent they physically reside with. This is what makes co-parenting and dating difficult. The person you are dating has to operate within the boundaries that are set, when it comes to your children. Even if they have the best interest of the children at heart and believes that they have effective solutions, these solutions should still be discussed between the parents. It is not your new partners role to modify rules and regulations; but to enforce and support the decisions that are set by the parents. Often, new partners overstep those boundaries when they feel that children are being treated harshly or unfairly. Still, it isn't their place to undermine the parent's position.
The fact that one parent isn't physically present doesn't make them any less important in their children's lives. Unless a parent has simply tossed their child away and moved on as if they didn't exist...they will always want to play a major role in their children's lives; at least until their of age. So, when parents realize that they don't work as a couple but continue to raise their children together; having boundaries in their new relationships is a necessity. This is even more important when the new relationship doesn't look promising.
Dating and co-parenting can be difficult for everyone involved. Everyone has to have respect for their own roles, as well as the roles of others. The lack of respect and boundaries can lead to problems that no one really wants. Your personal relationship will suffer and the relationship that you have with your child's other parent can be severely damaged. The best thing for everyone is to know exactly what their roles are and to play them.
Dating and co-parenting isn't always easy. No one ever wants to make the person that they're with believe that their feelings and opinions aren't valued. It's natural for the person that loves you to want to play a role in every facet of your life. Still, there are many things that parents need to think about when they are in a co-parenting situation.
Primarily, the depth of your new relationship needs to be evaluated before you even think about having this person involved in your child's life. It's pointless to introduce your child to an individual who isn't going to be around long. Children become attached to new parent figures quite easily. There is no need to put them in a predicament where they can be mislead.
Next, if you intend to make the new love of your life a permanent fixture, it would only make sense that the other parent is aware of it. This is not to say that your ex has any power in your personal life. However, there is a new person who will be a permanent presence in your child's life. This is especially true when there are younger children in the home. It's about having a mutual respect for one another.
Co-parenting only works on the basis that both parents are involved, to some level, in the choices that are made for the children; regardless of which parent they physically reside with. This is what makes co-parenting and dating difficult. The person you are dating has to operate within the boundaries that are set, when it comes to your children. Even if they have the best interest of the children at heart and believes that they have effective solutions, these solutions should still be discussed between the parents. It is not your new partners role to modify rules and regulations; but to enforce and support the decisions that are set by the parents. Often, new partners overstep those boundaries when they feel that children are being treated harshly or unfairly. Still, it isn't their place to undermine the parent's position.
The fact that one parent isn't physically present doesn't make them any less important in their children's lives. Unless a parent has simply tossed their child away and moved on as if they didn't exist...they will always want to play a major role in their children's lives; at least until their of age. So, when parents realize that they don't work as a couple but continue to raise their children together; having boundaries in their new relationships is a necessity. This is even more important when the new relationship doesn't look promising.
Dating and co-parenting can be difficult for everyone involved. Everyone has to have respect for their own roles, as well as the roles of others. The lack of respect and boundaries can lead to problems that no one really wants. Your personal relationship will suffer and the relationship that you have with your child's other parent can be severely damaged. The best thing for everyone is to know exactly what their roles are and to play them.
For every lesson in life, there's an article to be written!!!
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